9 Weeks Old

Well guys, he's home!

Needless to say, I'm so very happy!  Even though I've spent months waiting for his return, I feel as though I don't get to keep him-- as if he's about to leave again and I have to say goodbye once more.  This whole experience has been such a call to be present and in-the-moment, if you will.  I can't stop hugging him and touching his face and arms.  I've missed him so darn much.

It's been an easy transition having Trevor home with David and I.   Trevor's a nurturer, for sure, and so he fits right in.  He provides so well for my needs and has essentially picked up where he left off during my pregnancy--which, as hard as it is to believe, I was only 18 weeks pregnant when he deployed.  He says he's sad he couldn't help while he was away as he knows the pain I've been experiencing postpartum.

He's already much better at diaper changes than I am--and no, I'm not just saying that to get out of diaper duty!  Not sure what he's doing that's different than what I do, especially given I taught HIM how to do it.  He has the magic touch, I suppose.  Which works out well for him as he has two months worth of diapers to catch up on!  ;)

Life with Trevor home is so easy and my stress level has plummeted!  I'm resting instead of rushing--such a tremendous gift to this healing body of mine.  During David's 3am diaper change, I'm able to lay in bed as I watch the two of them interact.  Trevor smiles, David smiles.  Trevor reaches out and holds David's hand as he softly sings to him to which David coos sweetly in reply.

David's Daddy is finally home to bask in the joy of our little son.  My heart is so full.  So far I've been good about giving thanks to God each morning as a reminder not to take any of these blessings for granted.

24 January 2018:  Trevor's Homecoming // David Meets Daddy  (8w1d)
The night before Trevor's arrival I bathed David and laid out his little Indiana Jones outfit--the one we picked out the day we discovered we were expecting a boy!  Trevor's flight was set to arrive at 7:30 in the morning and so I planned accordingly--only issue, his plane landed an hour early!

Seems to me whenever I'm in a rush, I catch every single stinkin' yellow and red streetlight.  Can anyone relate?  When David and I strolled into baggage claim at LAX at 6:45am Trevor was already patiently waiting for us, large camouflage bags surrounding him.

All I remember is smiling at him and seeing him smile back at me as he pulled me in for a big hug.  I laid my head against his chest as a few tears of joy streamed down my face.  While holding me close with one arm, he pulled back the muslin blanket draped over David's bassinet seat with his free hand and took his very first in-person peek at our son,  "Oh honey, he's gorgeous!"

As Trevor reached into the stroller to pick up David I began filming this video:

A passerby from across the room inquires with a shout, "Is this the first time you're seeing your baby?"

Trevor politely nods with a smile in his direction.  The gentleman says, "Oh man" under his breath and walks towards us.

The stranger extends out his hand and offers to take a picture of our little family for us, "You've got to get in there too!  Let me take a picture of the three of you!" A bit skeptical and wary, I glance towards Trevor as if to ask if we can trust him with our expensive camera.  Trevor nods and so I hand over the Canon.  In the back of my mind I'm hoping that if this man steals our camera that he will at least leave the SD card behind so I don't lose the photos and video I've just recorded.

But thankfully he doesn't steal the camera.  Instead he snaps a few pictures, most of which are blurry but oh well.  It's evidence that I was there too, haha.

We stay in the airport for a bit longer and I watch Trevor as he snuggles David in his arms, kisses him atop his head and whispers in his ear, "I love you so much" as they rest cheek-to-cheek.  David takes to him right away and occasionally smiles and coos at Trevor.

After leaving the airport, our little family of three heads to breakfast at Martha's 22nd Street Grill in Hermosa Beach--a new venue for us that offered eggs benedict and freshly squeezed orange juice, so yummy!  Trevor takes on the full reins of fatherhood; lugs the diaper bag on one shoulder while he cradles David, insists on changing diapers and pushing the stroller, and he can't help himself from doting on David.  He's such a sweet, natural-born, affectionate father; as we all knew he would be. 

Once we finish breakfast, Trevor puts the stroller back into the Jeep so we can walk along the strand.  David nestles against Daddy's chest, zippered under Trevor's coat with a cozy blanket wrapped around him for extra warmth.  I think to myself how wonderful it is to have him home with us but can't shake the feeling I'm supposed to drop him back off at the airport, almost as if our time is limited.

For the rest of the day I can't stop hugging him.

Honestly, absence can totally make the heart grow fonder!  I look at him and I can't resist touching his arms and holding his face in my hands.  While it's true we're not as young as we used to be, I swear my love for him has never stopped growing.  Life with Trevor just keeps getting better.

Daddy's first diaper change!  Love those little feets.

Had to get his McChicken for lunch... 

That evening we join my mom for dinner at Island's restaurant.  She and Trevor get along so well--they frequent hardware stores and love to work on home improvement projects together.  These two defy the stereotypical mother-in-law/son-in-law relationship as they're very close and she truly missed having him home. 

Catching up with his little brother.

25 January 2018:  (8w2d)

Spotted this while on a walk.

26 January 2018:  (8w3d)

While Trevor and I sat in the Chik-fil-a parking lot he sighed to himself after finishing his meal.  Seemingly troubled by something, he stepped out of the driver's seat, took David out of his car seat, and sat with him in the back row of the Jeep as pictured.  Curious, I ask him to describe what he's feeling to which he replies, "Can't stand the thought of him sitting alone while I'm here.  I don't want to miss out on this chance to hold him."

Although the ache from deployment separation is dire, cherished perspective springs forth from it.  Our outlook on time spent together has changed forever and I'm glad.  May we always live in the extra-hour mentality, I recount; promising myself never to forget.

One of my favorite pictures of my boys.

David inherited his daddy's big, strong hands.

27 January 2018:  David's First Bath with Daddy!  (8w4d)

Diaper change at Dustin & Anna's new place.  Sorry guys, haha.

The sweetest, most thoughtful gift I have ever received!  Anna, thank you so much.  I adore it!

28 January 2018:  Two Months Old!  (8w5d)

Family cuddles

Opening Christmas presents!

Finding Nemo bath toys!

Heck yeah, dude.

Someone's eyelashes are growing!

Gotta love his expressive eyebrows, ha!

29 January 2018:  (8w6d)

New video baby monitor.  Here's hoping we like it!

Not too shabby!

30 January 2018:  9 Weeks Old! + 2 Month Pediatric Appointment
For a full rundown on David's 2-month pediatric appointment, check out this post!

In the waiting room before his 2-month appointment.

Cracking up at Daddy

9-Month Postpartum Updates

Body
So yeah, I'm past the 6-weeks postpartum mark and my OB cleared me for having *ahem* sex.  And yeah, my husband's home...

But no, I ain't doing that!  I was beginning to feel discouraged by how long my recovery is taking until I read 2nd degree tears can take upwards of 12 weeks to heal.  Every day is a little better but every day still involves pain.

Prior to Trevor returning home, I felt a bit insecure about my healing down there.  I don't really care how it looks perse (because, um, let's be honest.  Vaginas are kinda ugly creatures anyway if ya think about it?  Sarlacc Pit from Star Wars comes to mind. 😂) but I'm concerned I won't enjoy sex as much if the stitches healed in a wonky way.

Mind + Spirit
Other than feeling a bit disappointed that my body isn't 100% yet, things are well with me.

Trevor's home with us now, safe and sound where he belongs.  As I write this he's holding and kissing David.  There's no place I would rather be than here with my boys.